The Coronavirus Fear-of-Death Life-Inspection X-Ray is an invitation to explore the underlying fears triggered by the current global pandemic. This simple, yet empowering exercise will reveal the nutrients your soul is missing, the longings of your calling, your still-veiled potentials, and your unfulfilled destiny, allowing you to embrace fear as your ally and live life consciously, fully and authentically…..
Let’s get to the bottom of this, shall we? What are those sensations coursing up and down your spine when you hear the word ‘Coronavirus’? That tightness around your heart? Shallow breaths, survival-instinct alertness, ready to leap away, or fight, or just panic?
Yes. It is fear. Deep fear. High-intensity fear. Your fear.
What is that fear actually about? What are you truly afraid of? What do you imagine will happen to you if you get infected with coronavirus?
You don’t know?
That is because your Numbness Bar is so high.
You were trained to feel afraid of your fear, so you cut fear off at its source by raising your Numbness Bar to its maximal level.
This may not be as smart as you think. Your fear is not an accident. It is not there for no reason. Your fear has intelligence from all the years of your life to inform you about dangers. Your fear has energy to get you to safety.
Let’s do an experiment to find out what your Coronavirus Fear is actually about. Doing this experiment is simple. It starts by gently lowering your Numbness Bar.
Lower your Numbness Bar down so you start to notice the experience of 10% intense fear, 6% intense fear, even 3% intense fear coming directly from the source of the fear.
There is a lot of fear in you, fear about so many things. You have wasted so much fear-intelligence for so many years of your life.
Let yourself feel afraid right now. You don’t have to scream about it. Simply allow it to get big enough to talk with. Say, “Hello Fear. What do you have for me?”
Then listen. Get out your journal and write down what your Coronavirus fear tells you. Write page-after-page before you think:
Write: CORONAVIRUS CREATES IN ME THE FEARS OF:
- Fear of fever aches? The sweating? The shivering?
- Fear of headaches? The overall pain and lack of energy?
- Fear of being immobilized? Being stuck in bed?
- Fear of being identified as a sick person? A weakling?
- Fear of being separated out? Being quarantined?
- Fear of needing to be taken care of? Being a burden on others?
- Fear of not being able to get out and move around?
- Fear of not being allowed to be with my friends?
- Fear of being alone?
Is that all? Is that your real Coronavirus fear?
Or is there something else? Something bigger? Something unmentionable, something like your fear of dying?
Let us continue this experiment.
What is your fear of dying actually about? Keep writing. Use your own words and ideas.
Write: THE THOUGHT OF DYING CREATES IN ME THE FEARS OF:
- Fear of not knowing what happens after I die?
- Fear of being appreciated in heaven?
- Fear of being sent to hell?
- Fear of facing a reconciliation without secrets?
- Fear of being seen absolutely to my core?
- Fear of being caught?
- Fear of utter nothingness? The darkness? The silence?
- Fear of not being in charge anymore?
- Fear of being out of control?
- Fear of not being finished with life?
- Fear of not having lived enough?
- Fear of missing out on things?
- Fear of never getting another opportunity to try things?
- Fear of missing the hearts and glances of my friends?
- Fear of losing chances?
Chances for what? What is not complete for you right now? What have you not lived enough of? What are you missing right now? Keep writing:
Write: IT IS NOT OKAY FOR ME TO DIE NOW BECAUSE:
- I did not see enough sunrises.
- I did not risk being totally vulnerable.
- I did not take enough masks off to be fully seen.
- I have not experienced love deeply enough.
- I have not walked through enough of the world.
- I did not let myself feel enough of the awe of nature.
- I did not truly ask the important unanswerable questions.
- I have not risked enough trying out new things.
- I did not break away enough from other people’s expectations.
- I have not said, “No!” enough or “Yes!” enough.
- I did not make enough efforts to go beyond my habits and unfold my potentials.
- I did not discover who I really am and what my life is really about.
- I did not stop enough to notice what happens in those gaps between moments.
- I have not gone to the edge of the known and camped out there for a while.
Whatever you thought and wrote, whatever you realized while thinking about these questions, whatever your Coronavirus Death-Fear caused you to notice during the past few moments has wisdom in it. Your own wisdom about your own life. What are you going to do about it?
When coronavirus threatens to kill you or your loved ones (even your unmet loved ones) it functions like an x-ray on the current quality of your life.
Your Coronavirus Fear-of-Death Life-Inspection X-Ray reveals your soul-illnesses, what your spirit lacks, the longings of your calling, your still-veiled amazement potentials, your as-yet unfulfilled destiny, your unopened invitations to play full out.
Getting to look at an x-ray of your life is worth a lot. The fresh perspective may be shocking. It may make you terribly sad about the choices you previously made and the opportunities you have missed. Feel that pain. Grieve it. Let it wake you up.
Since you are reading this, you are not dead yet. You still have a chance.
Your Coronavirus Fear-of-Death Life-Inspection X-Ray is a near-life experience. You get to face into an old decision with a new kind of determination, a new level of clarity: Those things that your life is missing… those things you actually want and don’t want, those aliveness-nutrients you avoided until now… Which is bigger? Your fear of continuing to miss out on them? Or your fear of doing them?
Fear is fear. If you survive the coronavirus pandemic, your fears are not going to go away.
Sure, when the pandemic is over you could raise your Numbness Bar back to a high level of numbness again, but your body will still intelligently generate fear for you.
If fear does not go away, and you decide to go for the things the Coronavirus Fear-of-Death Life-Inspection X-Ray showed you that your life is missing, you might have to do those things afraid. Just go ahead and do them! Why not?
As your unquestionable imperatives dissolve, as your plans and self-imposed expectations to keep busy and productive become impossible to fulfill, you are left with space. It is not common knowledge, but having a space of nothingness at your core is exceptionally precious. That unfillable emptiness is not a mistake, not a design-error from God.
That emptiness at your center is where new stuff comes from. Try this: Whenever you are faced with an unanswerable question, an unknown challenge, reach deeply into the scary emptiness inside of you with your intention and grab onto something, anything. Pull it out. Voila! If what you pulled out is not a workable solution for your present needs, store it on a mental shelf for later use, and reach back into the inner void to pull out the next thing.
What is in your inner void? Nothing! What is possible in your inner void? Everything! This endless resource is within you wherever you are. You can grow accustomed to sensing your inner void ongoingly. This will make you more present, authentic, and spontaneously creative in your relations.
Yes, it can be scary to change your self-image so that you can look into the eyes of another person knowing that you have a void of nothingness and not-knowing at your core. But as the Coronavirus has taught you, fear is fear. Taking fear as your ally reveals many hidden treasures. There is so much to explore.
Clinton Callahan, originator of Possibility Management and Expand The Box trainings, author of Radiant Joy Brilliant Love / Building Love That Lasts, Directing the Power of Conscious Feelings, and Good Night Feelings, Possibilitator, Transformational Circle Alchemist, Fun-Raiser, Memetic Engineer, co-founder of General Memetics in the nanonation of Possibilica, Integrity Clarity Possibility Love Initiation and High-Level-Fun, Member of the Possibility Management Trainer Guild, committed to upgrading human thoughtware so we can play together at our highest potential. For a catalogue of possibilities for where you could go from here, visit http://spaceport.mystrikingly.com
Image: Thoughtmap of Your Numbness Bar, Clinton Callahan